As difficult as being in a relationship can be, being in a long distance relationship is even harder.
It challenges and pushes you in ways you could have never imagined while simultaneously missing the one you love.
Going in, you need to understand that while still in a relationship, long distance relationships are vastly different from typical relationships, so you have to understand how to navigate them accordingly.
In order to give your relationship a fighting chance, here are some things you should never do in a long distance relationship.
1. Don’t Let The Relationship Control Your Life
Whether you’re in the same city or a thousand miles apart, no relationship should consume your every waking hour. Spend the time apart doing meaningful things such as spending time with your family, picking up a hobby or hanging out with friends – basically, anything that can help you deal with the fact that you’re missing your significant other who is hundreds of miles away.
2. Don’t Rely On Only One Means Of Communication
We have Snapchat, text message, Twitter, Instagram, Facebook, phone calls and almost a hundred other ways to get in touch with them if one medium is faulty. If the phone lines are down, you can facebook them; if your internet is slow, you can always text or call. Just don’t get frustrated or paranoid when one mode of communication is not going through.
This does not mean that you should let trying to get in touch with them consume your day or you should facebook them as soon as you get off a call with them. While you miss them, a little space can be a good thing.
3. Don’t Blame Them For Lost Time
In a relationship, compromise will be made, this happens. What shouldn’t happen, especially in a long distance relationship is blaming your ex for those choices. Imagine waking up in the middle of the night just so you can talk to your significant other who’s probably just getting home from work, it’s pretty stressful.
However, if you’re making this sacrifice for them, they’re probably making it for you too. Waking up in the middle of the night can lead to loss of sleep which can lead to destabilized sleep when you eventually fall asleep and being late when you wake up.
Tip: Make these kinds of choices when you don’t have a lot to do the next day or find a suitable way to compromise.
Read Also: 7 Ways To Know You’re In Love
4. Don’t Be Out Of Reach During An Argument
You’ve heard the age-old rule of never going to bed angry, that also very much applies here. However, if you switch off your phones or ‘go dark’ after hanging up on a conversation, you leave your girlfriend/boyfriend with no other means of fixing the problem as soon it happens.
This is what allows a simple argument to grow into a massive quarrel, something it should have never been. Find healthier ways to express anger than going offline.
5. Don’t Pretend Everything Is Okay When It Isn’t
Don’t hide your feelings from your partner especially if you’re having trouble coping. They won’t be able to tell you’re upset by chats or clipped text message reply (they’ll most likely assume you’re busy).
While you may not want to worry them, you still have to let them know; that is one of the benefits of being in a relationship, having someone you can talk to at all times about whatever is making you smile or whatever is bothering you. Besides, you’re not required to set yourself on fire to keep someone else warm.
6. Don’t Listen To What People Say About Your Relationship
Chances are high that your family and friends, even your co-workers will have an opinion on your relationship, don’t listen to them. It is your relationship, not theirs, they don’t know your truth so they won’t be able to preach it.
Sure, you can confide in your best friend about whatever is bothering you but don’t take their speculation as gospel about what your significant other, who is miles away, is up to. They don’t know these things and neither will you until you speak to your girlfriend/boyfriend.
You will hear things like “Long Distance relationships never work anyway”, don’t listen to them. If your relationship is fine, just enjoy it the best you can.
7. Never Take Each Other’s Love For Granted
Sometimes when we feel so loved by a significant other who is miles away and the feeling of reality creeps in. You begin to feel like they can never cheat or you are irreplaceable. If you are in the same vicinity, that may be true, but since you are miles away, you never can tell.
Learn to appreciate each other as much and as often as you can.